English Spelling Made Simple

Updated: Mar 3, 2021

Comb, Tomb, or Womb...Say What?

If the plural of louse is lice

And more than one mouse are mice,

Then it surely must be

It seems certain to me,

That the plural of house is hice.

As you know, we have nephews and nieces,

And a piece can be split into pieces.

So you’ll be quick to agree

It’s quite plain to see

That more than one goose should be giecses.

It all goes to prove our thesis

That the plural of moose is miecses.

Hence, it’s easy to say,

As night follows day,

That a caboose times two makes cabieces.

We are thankful to God

That we’re not from abroad

With languages odd,

Rife with linguistic fraud.

Here we’re adept, of course

At telling horse from hoarse,

At orating with force,

Even in code by Morse.

We know a balm from a bomb

And a comb from the womb,

Which rhymes with room.

Tome and Rome? No, but tomb.

Yet…I do wonder why

We say “Hi” but climb high,

Eat our pie and drink rye.

How very wry, I sigh.

Aye-aye and bye-bye.

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